Have you ever had that “something isn’t right” feeling?
I have been having too many of them lately and last night I decided to go ahead and look into it and face it. Here is what I ended up with. It is all coming from extreme mental and physical exhaustion.
I have this very bad habit of telling myself I will take care of me as soon as I get a day off and when my day off comes then I’m too busy worrying about my not day offs and with that I just loop and loop on my weeks, months and years.
The stress and pressure start this new anxious feeling where all and everything starts to feel wrong even if some are just fine. I go into this state of mentality where regardless of what is in front of me, I have a deluded vision of wrong after wrong and with that comes questioning myself and I end up in a mess of “What am I going to do”
I know it is a Cliché, but it is true that happy body comes from happy mind and happy mind comes from peace. We as people pick on challenges every day that makes us excited regardless of how hard it might be on us to do them. Also, we keep working job and have friendship or relationships that drains us, but we keep pushing in hopes of change.
I really need to stop that. I need to make the change within myself and not what or whom is in my life. As a dear friend once told me, “we got to find those who match us and do what fits us”.
I have worked a job I hate, and I kept pushing for another paycheck and another paycheck to the point where it has taken full control of my mind and body. When I am at work hours I’ stressed beyond reason and when off work I’m stressed because I know of the stress coming next day
I have picked on challenges I never wanted to but due to pressure from friends and those I care for I just dived right in and now am paying the price of either letting them down or fall apart trying to get them done
And yes, relationship has its own crappy part which I don’t even want to get into right now
I guess at the end of the day I’m starting to realize how badly I have put myself in harmful and high stress situations just because I keep forgetting I should be my priority and nothing or no one else.
I mean yeah, I understand as a society we all have responsibilities but again as cliché as it is but if I’m not healthy and happy then there is nothing I can offer my fellow humans and our society.
Now challenge is to remember this and actually start applying it to my daily life…. Wish me luck as I wish those of you who are on the same page as I try to make a change …
