Expectations: one of the main reasons for many of us to be disappointed, discouraged, feel hopeless and helpless in life is our own expectations.
What are expectations? How real are they?
Expectations are made up standards, actions and results that we create in our own head based on our belief, our need and desire.
The problem with today’s society is that we think that our expectations are real and if they’re not met the disappointment will drive us to the point of rage. By holding on to that rage we allow yourself to start judging. Judging ourselves, or our capabilities, or value and sometimes even judging those we love and care for. And that very judgment affects our lives in so many negative ways.
Like many other words we have forgotten the real meaning of expectation.
ex·pec·ta·tion
/ˌekspekˈtāSH(ə)n/
noun
a strong belief that something will happen or be the case in the future.
a belief that someone will or should achieve something.
Yes, expectations are just opinions, expectations are just assumptions!
They are not the reality of our abilities or others. They are not even the reality of the circumstances in all situations that we expect a certain result out of. Yet we go on every day expecting things and results from ourselves, our life and people in it.
And with that we prepare ourselves for daily disappointment, hurtful feelings, overwhelmingly helplessness. But we never come back to the root of the problem. When was the last time that you sat down and considered why you felt disappointed or why you were feeling so hurt? Did you consider the fact that maybe you set a certain expectation in your own mind of someone or something that was never real but, you believed in it so strongly that it did become your reality?
I have done it; I can tell you as a result I learned a very valuable lesson in life that not only improved my own understanding of my capabilities but also made a huge improvement in my friendship, relationship and roll in human society. I learned that I can have expectations but that doesn’t mean they will be met. I learned that I can have expectations and hope for them to be met but if they don’t it doesn’t mean I failed, or someone failed me and with that I learned to enjoy every moment of life without being chained to my own assumption which makes my expectations.
Having expectations is a good motivator in life but relying and counting on them can destroy every hope and respect we have for ourselves or human society.
